Tuesday, June 01, 2004

Back in the Saddle Again

At least my attitude is back in the saddle. I interviewed for the PACT nurse position. While I know I'd like the work and the people, the benefits are lousy and I'd have to take a pay cut. Makes this job look amazingly better all of a sudden. So life is good. Dean is definitely moving out. Don't know what that will mean in the long run. But in the short run it means I'll have to buy a bed, a TV, a computer, and maybe a clothes washer. But I can cancel everything but local channels on cable. And I guess he will take over paying for his cell phone. I know that I will feel more at ease. The tension has been awful.

We had a brief argument this weekend because he was unkind to my child in front of my child's friends. When I objected, he said he would get an apartment today. I've never been good at arguing. It's too scary -- and I always lose. I think we exchanged maybe 4 sentences. I didn't raise my voice or really say anything other than I wanted the children to be treated with kindness.

It's probably a good thing that he's moving out, but that doesn't make it any less difficult.

Maybe I am not meant to have a life companion. But it sure would be nice if I did.

I've almost finished the dryad painting. Just have to put the birds in the branches and figure out what I'm going to do with the grass. It's looking good, I think.

I've also decided it's about time for another trip...next year will be the last big tax return I get, so we might as well. Alex and Gavin and I will all go to Scotland and maybe London as well, if I can make it work. I think we'd enjoy that, just the 3 of us. That's the first time we will have gone on a trip by ourselves.

Now, why Scotland, you may ask? Well, that's where Monty Python and the Holy Grail was filmed. Gavin doesn't really LIKE travelling all that much, so we might as well do something he could really enjoy...maybe stay in a castle one night, see Loch Ness, avoid the killer rabbit...I'm even considering renting a car while we're there. Don't know if I'm up to driving on the wrong side of the road. It'll take some concentration if so. Plus if we go to London, I don't REALLY want to drive in the traffic, so we'd only have the car a few days. I'll have to see how all that works out. :) But, plenty of time to plan. And we'll do the backpack thing again this time; it worked SO well when Alex and I went to Italy. And considering what Gavin hauls around in his backpack to school, I know he can haul his clothes (although he'd probably wear the same thing day and night if I let him, forget taking any clean clothes). And I will pack half as much this time...and I think jeans are more acceptable in the UK, so I won't even have to buy any clothes this time (if we go in March as planned, we'll be living in our coats anyway).

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