Is water polo played with seahorses?
At the orthopedist's office (the next office down), the patients stand in lines to check in...most of them on crutches, with casts, or other walking problems...why? Why not have 'em sit and have the receptionist come to them?
For that matter, why do most medical places have you stand in line to check in? Most people aren't feeling too well when they go to see a medical professional...
Did you know that if you want to bring blood or other body bits into the US, there's a special form for that? If you don't have it, Customs will confiscate your samples at the border. So to find this form, I called the Customs office. They, of course, don't issue those...you have to get it through the CDC. There are no telephone numbers on the CDC website that go to anything but recorded messages so I had to call Customs back. They gave me a number which was for computer support for the CDC. Computer support transferred me to the FDA, which does NOTHING with blood, and the lady on the other end was angry with me for even asking her for another number that might help. Tried the computer people again, since at least they tried to be helpful, and this time got an arm of the CDC that does public health...but all they do is provide brochures. So no luck. Finally decided to tackle it another way, and called a government agency that stores all kinds of human samples for the NIH (bet they've got some interesting stuff in their freezers!)...and the very very nice lady named Lori dragged their senior scientist out of a meeting to locate the form for me -- and then emailed me a copy.
HAH! Once again I triumph over the bureacracy! Oh heck. I can spell most stuff but this one escapes me. And I'm too lazy to look it up tonight. :)
Government agencies make me crazy.
I did get two studies submitted to the IRB, but one wound up with the dreaded Board 4...the board that rarely passes a study...sigh...
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
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You made me laugh so hard the dogs came in to see what had happened (the kid is glued to the TV and never noticed).
What does IRB mean?
What does IRB mean?
Harry's blog hasn't let me comment for days. Compared to that, Jodie's is easy. :D
Ah, the wonders of bureaucracy. It's called "Pass the Caller", a game for all agencies, whereby they can seem busy answering calls but really are only passing callers between them...
Obviously the computer department are too geeky to have grasped the rules of the game yet.
It's all my fault. Heck, I can't even comment on my own lately. But where was I?
Oh yeah -- at the border. I get being a smart-ass from my dad, who once was held (originally for offering up some pretty bad Spanish, we think) for over an hour, while the guardians tried unsuccessfully to get him to confess he had a green card, and not just a good tan. So me, I would have insisted on bringing across my own darn blood without anyone's consent. Then again, I understand why I don't travel far from the cave.
I think it should be illegal to schedule more patients than you have chairs in the waiting room.
Why can't we have drive-thru for basic checkups? I will hand you my left arm through the window, take my blood pressure and a few vials of blood. As for my height and weight, just take my word for it, I will let you know when the former decreases from osteoporosis and the latter increases from the metabolism that deserted me years ago and the desserts that won't desert but hide themselves in fat cells I have been saving for them.
I could have warned you Jodie- I find it to be a big hassle evertime I bring blood and body parts into the country. It's such a headache that I'm thinking of giving it up, which will really piss off my Master (and there's NOWHERE that I can hide from THAT guy), but I'll just take my chances.
Can I come live with you?
Gone, you must be right on the computer thing...they were about the only government people who were helpful.
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Mary, look at my Feb archive -- there's a whole post on the IRB.
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I dunno, Dave, I have Evil Dog Wiley living at my house...you'd have to take your chances. :D
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Ned, those drive ups sound great -- although I hear Target's got the next best thing -- a walk up clinic in the store staffed with nurse practitioners. In and out in 15 minutes! Can't wait for MY Target to put one in!
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Harry, I keep trying to comment on your blog, and it just never posts! :(
When I was a bureaucrat (yes, I even have a master's degree in such a specialty) we had our own version of "Pass the Caller." We had one guy who came up with acronyms for everything and for the worst, nastiest, pain in the butt callers he came up with "MFDCH." It stands for "Mother ** Don't Call Here!" After he'd hang up the phone sometimes, he'd yell that statement repeatedly. He was a lawyer and I worked in a criminal justice agency so every day was an adventure in ugliness.
Anyway, he'd transfer calls to me, as I was the PR person, and he'd tell me he had an "MFDCH" on the phone for me.
The phrase comes in handy, even around our house.
The Good Book teaches us to be patient, and so does (blanking) Blogger, in regard to these commenting difficulties.
"When will it end, mama?", the little boy cried.
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